We all want to look great as we age but to many, aging gracefully is a thing of luck, some are lucky to continue looking good with age and others aren’t; nothing could be farther from the truth. Actually, persons who age gracefully lucky to be aging better, they are simply aging smarter and the secret is as much in what they do as much as it’s in what they don’t do. As life expectancy continues to increase globally, there’s no better time to look and feel better.

Aging as a process first begins from the mind then the body. When one believes they are aging or more appropriately growing old, they soon begin to feel that way and the signs soon manifest in their physique. It’s no rocket science, it’s an age-long fact – we are what we think we are. What this means is that to reverse the aging process and look and feel young, we have to change the way we think. Our approach to aging and life has to improve by letting go of bad thought patterns and embracing new, positive thought patterns. Some mental hacks which can help reverse the aging process include:

• Letting go of old beliefs which hold you back
• Taking up challenges which test our physically and mentally. Taking up a new sport or registering for the gym is a good way to start.
• Paying little or no attention to negative thoughts and emotions
• Growing the habit of giving, to friends, family and strangers.
• Spending more time with friends and family

One of the most common reasons people are reluctant to make changes to their lifestyle as they grow older is that they believe that aging prevents them from doing most things. Sure, as we grow older, there are certain things we won’t be able to do as well as we used to. However, growing old doesn’t affect the most important things needed to feel young and alive. For example:

• If you are creative, old age does not affect your creativity. In fact, some of the most iconic ideas have come from persons who would be considered old.
• Growing older doesn’t affect your relationship with friends and family. No matter how old you are, you can maintain a relationship especially if you happen to be retired, giving you more time to spare.
• Age doesn’t affect your sense of humor. If you have it, nothing can snatch it from you and who says you can’t grow one as you go older?
• Even if you have any physical limitations, it means nothing as even young persons have to deal with physical problems sometimes. All you need to is to find a way to manage your limitation and continue enjoying your life.

Finally, growing old doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your life and lucky for you, we have given a few habits of graceful agers. If you would like to learn more or require personal assistance, we are here to help you.

Recognising what your strengths are. The power of understanding your worth.

In our self-deprecating society, it can be easy to lose sight of our innate qualities that make us unique. From an early age we’re taught not to boast, to be humble and never raise our head above the parapet. But what if you could live a happier, more fulfilled life, simply by identifying and acknowledging what your strengths are?

Too often we default to dissecting our weaknesses, focusing on our flaws and limitations and defining ourselves by those traits. I encourage you to instead focus on what positive qualities you possess. Perhaps you’re cool under pressure? Or a loyal friend? The adjectives you use to describe yourself don’t have to be linked to where you are in your career or personal life – being a great leader isn’t reserved only for people with that job title, nor is being artistic reserved for people with the time to create art. Take some time out of your day to sit down and reflect on what your strengths are, then choose five words that represent you. If you struggle, there are plenty of online resources that have collated words together. When you know what your strengths are, you can find your way in life, whatever challenges are thrown your way.

“They tried to bury me, but did not know that I am a seed”- Mexican proverb

Before moving on to assessing your weaknesses, it’s important to understand the concept of a ‘growth mindset’. Essentially, growth mindset is the concept that believing you have the ability to develop a skill, is more related to success than inherently possessing the skill itself. The ‘fixed mindset’ that many of us are guilty of, instead believes that our abilities are outside of our control, that we either naturally have skill in an area, or not.

We will all be faced with challenges in life, how we approach these challenges defines our view of the world. Did you get passed up on that management promotion because you aren’t good enough? Or do you know that you have great leadership skills, but that one of your weaknesses is being vague, which might have hindered you in your interview? Knowing yourself innately allows you to see opportunities for development, instead of problems. As obstacles present themselves, you are equipped to deal with them based on your knowledge of self.

Introspection and self-analysis are not always easily done alone – it can be difficult to see the forest for the trees, so to speak. If you feel that you would benefit from exploring what your strengths are with a qualified practitioner, we would love to help.

As much as it hurts, failure is an important part of life. In short, failure is necessary. I have failed more times than I would want to admit. I can’t say that I enjoy failing, but through its life-altering lessons, failure moulds us into better persons. Without failure, we would be incapable of compassion, kindness, empathy and great achievement.

When we think of what failure is, we imagine things in a negative light. We see it as painful and that it inflicts agonizing pangs of remorse, regrets and guilt. But, for people that have known failure and have bounced from it, understand that in life failure is necessary for success. The most successful people in the world have failed the most times. You can’t go through life without failing at anything, and if you try to, then you’re not really living a life as a matter of fact. Falling down flat on our faces while taking risk is a part of life, it moulds us into who we are. Even a baby will fail a thousand times before finally mastering the art of walking.

The problem however is that society tends to celebrate the successes instead of highlighting the epic journeys towards success that are filled with tribulations, trials, setbacks, failures and upsets because it’s not as glamorous to talk about those things. Michael Jordan missed about 9000 shots throughout his career, lost over 300 games and 26 times when he was trusted to take the game winning shot he missed, and that’s why according to him he succeeds.

Why is it necessary to fail?

Failure is a steppingstone. It is necessary to fail. In fact, I will highlight 5 very powerful life lessons taught and instilled in us by failure

1. Experience: The first major lesson gained from failure is experience. When we go through a situation and can walk away with forehand experience, it aids us in developing a deeper understanding of life. The experience of failure is truly invaluable as it completely alters our mind frame through the induction of pain. It makes us want to reflect on the real nature of things and their paramount importance in our lives, improving and transforming our future-selves.
2. Knowledge: Failure is accompanied with firsthand knowledge. We can harness that knowledge in the future to overcome that very failure that has inflicted much pain in the first place. Nothing replaces knowledge gained from failure.
3. Resilience: Failure helps to build resilience. With each failure we become more resilient. In order to achieve unprecedented success, we must know resilience. Because, if we try to think that we would succeed in the very first try, or even the first few attempts, then we’ve set ourselves up for a far more painful failure.
4. Growth: When we fail, we grow and mature. We reach deeper meanings and understandings in our lives and why we do the things we do. This assists us to reflect and take things into clear perspective, developing meaning from painful conditions. Life has been designed for us to grow and improve. From the genetic fibers that moulds us into individual persons, into the fabric of society on a global scale, growth is a typical part of us. Without growth, we could not improve life on all fronts.
5. Value: one very big lesson we can learn from life’s failures is the necessity to create an exceedingly high amount of value. Value, in fact lies at the heart of success and a lack of value is a fundamental pillar to more failure.

How to Recover From Failure

Many ways exists that can help one recover from failure. Once you’ve come to terms with what failure is, and its prospects in serving us rather than hinder us, you’ll open your heart and free your mind to experience the joy of failure.

1. Ignore the naysayers. When you fail, without a doubt there will be people telling you, “You should have listened to me” and, “I told you so.”
2. Understand that it’s okay to Fail. One of the major ways of recovering from failure is understanding that it’s all right to fail but not okay to give up.
3. Using failure as a leverage: when you fail in life, you should consider it a leverage to not only recover from it, but to help push you forward in the future. Failure is a platform for growth that is simply unmatched.
   To leverage failure, illuminate them to your mind. Pen down what you failed and why you failed. Are there deep enough meanings to your goals in the past? What could have been done differently? How will you now tackle those failures in the future when you face them? How will you learn from the past to assist you in shaping a bigger and brighter future?
4. Revisit your goals and seek to know how clear you were with your goals. Were they exact, precise and feasible? Were you able to visualize them in your mind?
5. Spend time to analyze and adjust where necessary. Revisit your goals and redefine them.
6. Create a massive action plan: Lay out a plan on how you’re going to achieve your goals. What will you do incase failure rears its ugly head next time?

Set up a solid action plan that will help you push past life’s hurdles and watch as you recover from setbacks or failures. At Nelumbo Consultancy we can help you setup a solid plan which will help you recover from a setback or failure. Contact us today let’s work on one.